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First, a little perspective. There's a common thread that bonds such films as Aliens, Blade Runner, Cool Hand Luke, The Manchurian Candidate, The Matrix, Spartacus, Toy Story, The Wild Bunch, and Wild Strawberries. What do those great films have in common? The answer: NONE of them were nominated for a Best Picture Oscar. The Academy Awards ceremony is a lavish affair and an entertaining TV spectacle that will never go away, but let's be honest - the Oscars aren't the best barometer for what will eventually become legendary in the annals of cinema history. Of course, that doesn't mean we have to stop trying to analyze the often mysterious decisions on a yearly basis. The fact is that the Oscars have long been divisive, and writing about them is bound to anger someone ... But, as we all know, that's part and parcel of what comes with the Oscars.
One man's masterpiece is often another man's pretentious crap, but that's just part of life. As in past years, 2007's Oscar nominees once again reflect the vagaries of Academy voting. Show me a person who thinks it's a historic tragedy that The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford only landed two nominations and ten bucks says the person next to him probably thinks it was two too many. Much has been made about the incredible failure of the Oscars' Foreign Language Film committee this year, a group that excluded the two most award-winning eligible films - 4 Months, 3 Weeks, and 2 Days and Persepolis - before they could even be considered. To be blunt - that category is a joke. A select group of nearly-retired Academy members seem to bungle it every year. How and why, who knows for sure? While the nominees might be worthwhile, I'd like to speak to someone who can tell me with a straight face that all of this year's nominees are better than 4 Months, Persepolis, The Orphanage, or even The Host. It can now be seen as an outdated, ridiculously designed category that makes for the perfect bathroom break as it's being awarded.
The same can be said for Best Original Song. With the clever songwriting in Walk Hard, excellent work by Eddie Vedder in Into the Wild, and new recordings by John Mayer, The Flaming Lips, Rufus Wainwright, Aimee Mann, John Legend, Sondre Lerche, and BOB freakin' DYLAN - all who were eligible this year - the Academy chose to nominate three songs from Enchanted. Sure it's a cute Disney movie, but three? A hat trick for a movie as musically profound as Once would be understandable, but did anyone walk out of Enchanted humming the tunes? With Best Foreign Language Film and Best Song out of the way, here are our picks for the ten biggest Oscar snubs from 2007.
10. Best Animated Feature - Anything but Surf's Up... you name it!
9. 300 for anything
300 was far from a perfect film, but it was undeniably a technically accomplished work that should have been recognized in one or two the technical categories. Not a single nod was granted to the film that blew out more than a few theater speakers last March, and that's just not right. The sound design, the editing, and the visual effects all deserved consideration. The movie received accolades from the Art Directors Guild, Cinema Audio Society, Costume Designers Guild, and Visual Effects Society, but couldn't land a single Oscar nomination. Sin City also missed out on the Oscar party a couple of years ago, scoring a goose egg for nominations, which makes it clear the Academy hasn't figured out how to deal with, or correctly honor, green-screen films. Don't hold any hope for Speed Racer to have the words "Oscar-nominated" on its DVD case.
Love her or hate her, you must admit she has dick-sucking lips. Those feisty eyes and undoubted kinkiness in bed can also draw you in -- or eat you alive, if you’re lucky. She’s done more charity than she has bad movies, which makes her quite ambitious. Angelina is currently helping refugees as an ambassador to UNHCR, and she gives money to just about everyone except Jennifer Aniston. Check her out naked in “Gia.” That’s making the world a better place right there.
Her antics reportedly got her an arrest warrant from Japan: she jumped in the ocean to stop fisherman from killing dolphins, and you can bet that got her wet in many places. To make her an even hotter giving-goddess, she is auctioning off her clothes to support Save the Whales. If you’re lucky she won’t have anything left to wear. One wonders if this fresh young hero smells like fish.
A beautiful stripper in “Closer,” Natalie sweats in real life too. She trekked through a jungle in the Congo to film a documentary about endangered gorillas, one of which she named “Ahazaza.” Just try screaming that aloud in bed. She also works for FINCA, helping give business loans to women in poor countries who otherwise would be forced to work as a much less hot version of her “Closer” role.
Natalie’s hot, generous, and smart enough not to give a lap dance to one of your buddies when you aren’t around. What more could a man need?
She raised $260,000 for disabled children at a screening of “Good Luck Chuck,” although it’s a fair guess she wasn’t nude. That may change as she donates to “Clothes Off Our Back,” another charity where celebrities donate their clothes (this time to support childrens’ charities). If you buy enough of her shirts, will she finally go topless?
She also apparently supports RADD, which "creates positive attitudes about road safety." Seeing as how she probably creates more car crashes walking down the street than any other lady, it’s only fair.
This poor young model was stuck in a tree for eight hours during the 2004 tsunami in the Indian Ocean. As if she hadn’t already made a tree happy and given everyone else plenty of wood, she created the charity “Happy Hearts” to support children who were victims of the tsunami. Something tells me it isn’t just the hearts that are happy when the males of the species look her up. Would you let her cling to you in a storm? Czech!
She also lost her fiancée in the tsunami, which makes her single.
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