Batman 3: Johnny Depp Definitely The Riddler, But Probably Not

The Batman 3 casting rumours have so far been numerous and vague, but at least one thing’s for certain - Johnny Depp will definitely play The Riddler.

That’s a stone cold fact. You heard it here first. Why are we so sure that Johnny Depp will play The Riddler in Batman 3? Because Johnny Depp recently briefly mumbled something desperately ambiguous about it possibly being quite fun to maybe play The Riddler during a local radio interview with his band.

See? That’s means Johnny Depp is definitely going to be The Riddler in Batman 3, which is why we’ve already started to manufacture a set of Johnny Depp Batman 3 Riddler action figures. OK, admittedly we just got a load of unsold Pirates Of The Caribbean action figures and Tippexed question marks onto their backs but - face it - that’s probably what he’ll be like in the film anyway.

We know this is a bit premature, but we’re absolutely confident that Batman 3 is going to be the best film ever made. Seriously, ever.

Look at how The Dark Knight ended, with Batman living in fear as a supposed criminal vigilante. Batman 3 is going to have the same feeling of doomy paranoia and creeping dread, but it’ll also have Cher titting around in a rubber doily too. There’s something for everyone there, provided that you’re a manic depressive comicbook fan or a stereotypical homosexual.

But what if you want more from The Dark Knight’s sequel than a fed-up Batman and a terrifyingly expressionless pensionable Catwoman who keeps getting her old lady minge out? What if, for instance, you want to see The Riddler in Batman 3?

Well, frankly, if that’s the case you’re an idiot. The Riddler is rubbish. He’s basically The Joker but with a green hat and a thing for Sudoku. He’s Henry Kelly from Going For Gold with a bee in his bonnet. He’s rubbish. Don’t argue, we’re right. He’s rubbish.

But none of that fierce logic is washing with Christopher Nolan. It’s long been rumoured that he’d like to cast Johnny Depp as The Riddler in Batman 3. So far Johnny Depp has kept quiet over the reports, but during a local radio interview recently, he decided to share his thoughts on the matter:

Host: Hey Johnny, a listener called in earlier said you have to ask about the rumors on the internet of you doing the Riddler.
Depp: Oh yeah, I heard about that. Not that I know of.
Host: You’d be a good choice.
Depp: It seems like it’d be a fun gig for a while, yeah.

“It seems like it’d be a fun gig for a while, yeah.” If that’s not official confirmation of the casting, we don’t know what is. But you know what this means?

It’s obvious. Cher as Catwoman and Sweeney Todd’s Johnny Depp as The Riddler? Batman 3 is going to be a musical!

That’s excellent news, and we’d like to take this opportunity to offer Christopher Nolan our specially-composed pieces I’m Just A Lonely Millionaire With A Creepy Bat Fixation, Butla Rapp and Don’t Kiss Me Catwoman (You Have A Moustache Like My Gran). Don’t be stealing our ideas, Nolan.

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In a world of movie trailers, Don LaFontaine was king

Don LaFontaine records a commercial in the recording studio in his Los Angeles home in February 2007. He was one of Hollywood's most prolific voice actors. (Damian Dovarganes/Associated Press)

Don LaFontaine, the man who provided the sonorous voice for more than 5,000 movie trailers, died Monday at age 68.

LaFontaine died at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles of complications from a collapsed lung. He had been taken to the hospital Aug. 22 with a blood clot in the lung.

LaFontaine was known as the "king of the movie trailers," having done the trailer voiceovers for films such as Terminator, Fatal Attraction, Cheaper by the Dozen, Batman Returns and his personal favourite, The Elephant Man.

His baritone voice and melodramatic delivery are famously associated with the oft-repeated movie trailer phrase, "In a world…"

He also has been parodied by comedians such as Janeanne Garofolo and Pablo Francisco and even participated in parodies of himself, including a shtick in The Simpsons Movie in which Homer repeats what LaFontaine says right after he says it.

LaFontaine also did thousands of television commercials, network promotions, video game trailers and other spots.

He told Entertainment magazine he did more than 60 such promotions a week, and at one point was famous for having a driver take him from studio to studio to save time finding parking.

With the advent of digital recording that could be sent from a home studio, he began recording spots in his Hollywood Hills home.

LaFontaine worked for every major U.S. network, including NBC, CBS, ABC, Fox and UPN, in addition to TNT, TBS and the Cartoon Network.

He did voiceovers on shows as diverse as the 79th Annual Academy Awards, America's Most Wanted and Entertainment Tonight.

He also did spots for Chevrolet, Pontiac, Ford, Budweiser, McDonalds, Coke and many other corporate sponsors, according to his website.

A 'one-man army'

Born Aug. 26, 1940, in Duluth, Minn., LaFontaine enlisted in the army after high school and learned to become a recording engineer. He began his career as a recording engineer for National Recording Studios and produced his first promo for Dr. Strangelove.

The man he was working with, Floyd Peterson, started a company to produce promos, and the two helped create some of the clichés of the movie trailer, including phrases such as "In a world," "A one-man army" and "Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide and no way out."

While working on the 1964 movie Gunfighters of Casa Grande, he filled in for another voice actor in a radio promo. This led to more voice work, and by the 1970s, he was one of Hollywood's busiest voice actors.

He became head of production for Kaleidoscope Films Ltd., a trailer production house, and in 1976 he started his own production company, Don LaFontaine Associates.

His first assignment as an independent was The Godfather, Part II.

From 1978 to 1981, he worked exclusively for Paramount, becoming the voice of the company. After that, he became independent again and moved to Los Angeles to be closer to the studios.

Among his most recent assignments were an appearance (in person) in a Geico ad, a voiceover for Arrested Development and promos for Borat and the Disney movie Meet the Robinsons.

LaFontaine is survived by his actress-singer wife, Nita Whitaker, and three children.

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10 Classic Film Comedies for a Well-Rounded Geek

By Matt Blum

We've had a lot of posts about newer movies here on GeekDad, but everyone knows it's important to read classic novels in order to properly appreciate modern ones, and, likewise, it's important to watch classic movies. Now, many classic movies are too complicated or too intense for kids, so it seems appropriate to start the discussion with comedies. Here are ten comedies that are essential viewing for every geek:

1. Duck Soup - It's hard to pick just one Marx Brothers movie, but this is probably the easiest one for kids to appreciate. The songs in Duck Soup are all silly ones, unlike in most of their movies. And there's tons of slapstick, like the scene with Harpo, Chico, and the lemonade vendor, and of course the famous mirror scene. The political satire will go right over most kids' heads, but teenagers will love it. The only thing to watch out for is a then-acceptable, now-racist line from Groucho: "The Headstrongs married the Armstrongs and that's why darkies were born."

2. The Court Jester - Danny Kaye was a comic genius, and this is one of his best movies. It's accessible to kids because of the Robin Hood-era setting, and the story is, while not uncomplicated, mostly unnecessary to enjoy the funniest bits. Plus, it's got Basil Rathbone parodying himself, and Angela Lansbury as a self-absorbed princess. You can't miss.

3. Sons of the Desert - Laurel and Hardy's best, with all the lines delivered with their trademark comic precision. While they made at least three other movies with essentially the same plot as this one, it's probably the best introduction to the pair.

4. The General - Probably Buster Keaton's best movie, with some of the most amazing stunts ever performed on film. The movie simply never stops moving start to finish, and has enough slapstick and other visual humor that most kids probably won't care that it's a silent film.

5. Safety Last! - Another silent, this is the Harold Lloyd film where he famously hangs from the face of a clock. It's short, very funny, and amazing to watch the stunts. Plus, if you take our advice and show your geeklings Back to the Future, they'll recognize the homage in the clock-hanging scene in that movie--and you can tell them about the Harold/Christopher Lloyd connection, too (though they're not related).

(More after the jump.)

6. Buck Privates - Show your kids "Who's on First," of course, but that's only four minutes long. As their movies went, Abbott and Costello didn't get much better than they were in their first big movie. It's funny throughout, but is worth it just for the scene where Costello explains to Abbott that 28 divided by 7 is 13, which may possibly not be good for kids still learning early math skills (kidding!).

7. Bringing Up Baby - Cary Grant. Katherine Hepburn. A leopard. One of the best screwball comedies ever made. What more could you possibly want?

8. Modern Times - More slapstick, with its master Charlie Chaplin. Most kids won't get the social commentary, but the Little Tramp is bound to appeal. Worth it just for Chaplin's famous trip through the machinery.

9. The Great Race - The most recent movie on the list (1965), this Jack Lemmon/Tony Curtis film isn't as great as Some Like It Hot, but is much more accessible to kids. It's ostensibly about a car race around the world, but it's really about as much slapstick as Blake Edwards could fit into a movie with a whole bunch of great actors.

10. It Happened One Night - The original screwball comedy, with Clark Gable at his most charming. You can even teach the kids a bit about the time period, mentioning the possibility (unconfirmed) that sales of men's undershirts may have fallen drastically after the scene where Gable takes off his shirt to show his bare chest.

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