Everyone knows rock and roll is about thrills and excess—we just didn’t realize that spirit was supposed to extend to the greenroom buffet. The following are seven very pampered acts that made sure their laundry list of demands got tacked onto their contracts.
1. Van Halen and the Whole M&M’s Thing
Van Halen first gained notoriety for their stipulation that, at every gig, their dressing room was to contain a large bowl of M&M’s, but with all the brown ones removed. And while this has often been cited as proof of the band members’ towering egos, it was actually included by tour promoters as an easy way of seeing if the concert venues had read the contract thoroughly (particularly the parts about technical requirements). But sneaky M&M tactics aside, Van Halen’s riders are also notorious for the sheer volume of alcohol they stipulate. One rider specified that their dressing room was to contain a case of beer, a pint of Jack Daniel’s, a pint of Absolut, a 750 ml bottle of Bacardi Añejo rum, three bottles of wine, small bottles of Cointreau and Grand Marnier, and a 750 ml bottle of one of five specific premium tequilas. Don’t forget six limes, margarita salt, shot glasses, ingredients for Bloody Marys, and a blender. Sure, there are only four dudes in the band, but shouldn’t you expect this sort of behavior from a group whose bassist plays a guitar shaped like a bottle of Jack?
2. J-Lo’s Trailer from the Park
There are divas, there are superdivas, and then there’s Jennifer Lopez. That’s right, the same sultry soulstress who preaches the “keep it real” street mantra also happens to require a trailer at least 40 feet in length, in which everything is white. That means drapes, couches, candles, tablecloths, lilies, and roses (she also requires yellow roses with red trim thrown in as well). And if you’re hoping to keep a prolonged smile on “Jenny from the Block’s” pretty mug, you can’t forget the selection of current CDs she requires, chosen from a list of 43 artists, or her three favorite scented candles from Diptyque—Tuberose, Figuier, and Heliotrope. And that’s just from her contract for a charity song benefiting AIDS victims in Africa! Oh, and did we mention Jenny was only at the event for a total of 90 minutes? It’s almost as if her ego’s as big as her . . . nope, too easy.
3. Guns N’ (Long-Stemmed) Roses
Cher’s wig room, Weird Al’s weird water demand and the star who needs 24-pieces of chicken and a pack of condoms before every show, all after the break.
They were one of the biggest bands of the 1980s and ’90s. Just ask them. And in a band of big egos, the very biggest was lead singer Axl Rose. He had his own dressing room, stocked with plenty of the things a vocal professional needs: hot water and honey (Sue Bee brand only); a rib-eye steak dinner; a large pepperoni pizza; a deli tray with a heavy emphasis on lean roast beef, ham, and turkey; and a bottle of Dom Perignon. His bandmates had much simpler tastes. Their dressing room was to contain lots of chips, nuts, exotic fruits, and cheese. Of course, they went a little less simple on the drinks. Aside from a few cases of soda, the band also required four cases of beer, two fifths of Jack Daniel’s, two fifths of Stolichnaya vodka, two bottles of Chardonnay, and a bottle of Jägermeister. Oh, and don’t forget to throw in a couple bottles of . . . carrot juice? Clearly, it’s the cornerstone behind every successful rock act. As are the four cartons of cigarettes and the assortment of adult magazines you’ll need to provide.
4. Meat Loaf (Just a Little Overdone)
Yes, that Meat Loaf. The man who brought us Bat Out of Hell obviously requires quite a bit in return. His rider states that the promoters are to recognize that they are dealing with an international “superstar” and therefore all provisions must be first class, as befits a “superstar.” And that’s two words: Meat. Loaf. Sheesh! His dressing room spread must include, among many other things, a loaf of 100% multigrain bread (preferably Vogel’s Flaxseed & Soy), two bags of potato chips, a package of low-fat chicken or turkey wieners, four Gala apples (specifically, hard and crunchy ones), four low-fat fresh-baked muffins from a bakery, steamed broccoli and green beans amandine (not too soggy), a sliced roast pork tenderloin, a sliced roast beef tenderloin, and two baked potatoes. And this is supposed to feed two people. We’re guessing they’re both for the Loaf.
5. Poison’s Poison
Pretty standard for a rock band, really. Deli trays, condiments, lots of booze, etc. But what
was Poison’s poison? Apparently, pyrotechnics. Their contract also required that all the venue’s smoke and fire detectors be switched off due to the band’s flair for flares. So how do we think the concertgoers would feel knowing that little tidbit? Also very odd, Poison’s rider stipulates that an American Sign Language interpreter must be made available on request for the band’s deaf fans. And the band will need 24 hours’ notice if the ASL interpreter needs the lyrics beforehand. Of course, some critics claim that most of the band’s fan base was deaf (records sold being proof).
6. The Village People’s Payment Plan
You might think that a bunch of guys as past their prime as The Village People would just be glad to get a gig. Nope. They still draw a crowd, so therefore they still have demands in their rider. The front page of their rider contains one stipulation: that all balances to The Village People be paid in “CASH” (yes, it’s in all caps). It goes on to say that they can only be photographed in costume, that they won’t fly in prop planes, and that they prefer certain seats in the plane (as specific as “aisle, rear right side of plane” for the Navy guy) and certain airports of origin. Disco may be dead, but ego certainly seems to be staying alive.
7. Various Spoiled Artists
Oh, there are just so many. Celine Dion requires a children’s choir with 20 to 24 children of all races. Pavarotti used to demand that there be no noise backstage or distinct smells anywhere near him; but he did want a golf cart. Cher can’t perform without a wig room, cable TV that gets Turner Classic Movies, and a room for her massage therapist. “Weird Al” Yankovic is a strict vegan and forbids Dasani water. Elton John demands that his dressing room be kept at 60° in summer and 70° in winter. And Busta Rhymes insists that there be no pork or beef anywhere near his dressing room; but he does want a 24-piece bucket of KFC and a box of Rough Riders condoms (ribbed).
Ed. Note: This list was pulled from Forbidden Knowledge.
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