Saturday, March 8, 2008

My Kid Could Paint That

Marla Olmstead. Click image to expand.

Marla Olmstead made her first abstract painting while still in diapers, crouching on her parents' dining-room table. She was not yet 2. Her big break came when she was 3, and a family friend hung her paintings in a coffee shop in her hometown of Binghamton, N.Y. By the time she was 4, she was scarfing down cookies at the packed opening of her first solo gallery show. A local reporter covered the story, and the New York Times picked it up. Soon, news crews from all over were rushing to report on the adorable blond moppet and her colorful canvases, calling her a "budding Picasso," a "pint-sized Pollock." Within a few months, she sold more than $300,000 worth of paintings. And then, just short of her 5th birthday, the bubble burst. In February 2005, 60 Minutes aired a report by Charlie Rose implying that Marla's father, a night-shift manager at a Frito-Lay plant and an amateur painter himself, was guiding her compositions. Sales of the paintings quickly dried up, the family was barraged with hate mail, and the New York Post gleefully piled on the puns, reporting that "the juvenile Jackson Pollock may actually be a full-fledged Willem de Frauding."

In his new documentary, My Kid Could Paint That, director Amir Bar-Lev traces Marla's sensational rise and fall, focusing on the media feeding frenzy and on the Olmsteads' efforts to prove that Marla created her paintings unaided. Whatever the degree of parental coaching, Bar-Lev's footage reveals a child who clearly enjoys painting. We see her squeezing gobs of thick acrylic paint directly from the tube onto the canvas, smooshing it around with brushes, fingers, and spatulas, and using plastic squeeze bottles to add delicate squiggles and swirls. Yet, when Bar-Lev tries to film her creating a single work from start to finish, the camera-shy toddler grows silly and restless, and in one incriminating scene, begs her father to draw a smiley face on her picture. (He declines, grinning nervously.)

The possibility of fraud is the film's narrative engine, and Bar-Lev isn't shy about voicing his own doubts about the works' authenticity, or reflecting, a la Janet Malcolm, on the queasy blend of complicity and betrayal that typifies the relationship between journalist and subject. In one excruciating scene, Bar-Lev shares his misgivings about the paintings with Marla's mother, Laura, a dental technician. "I need you to believe me," she says, staring into the camera. The interview ends in tears.

All this makes for a fascinating story about stage parents, media hype, and the ethics of documentary filmmaking. But in focusing on Marla as a media and market phenomenon, the film gives short shrift to some of the more intriguing questions about what it means to look at a 4-year-old's splattery abstract canvases in the context of art. Marla's paintings, with their swirling colors and expressive brushstrokes, have been compared repeatedly to the work of modern masters like Kandinsky and Pollock. Does it matter that she has no knowledge of these artistic precedents, and most likely, no clear concept of "art" itself? Is Marla a prodigy or a primitive? Can a work of art transcend the intentions of its maker? If a child can make great abstract paintings, does this mean that modern art is itself a hoax, a high-culture con game?

Ten years ago, I traveled around Thailand with Russian conceptual artists Vitaly Komar and Alex Melamid, teaching domesticated elephants to hold brushes in their trunks and apply paint to canvas. The project was cheerfully satirical, but the elephants really did learn to paint, and their bold, gestural abstractions were strikingly similar to Marla's—and raised many of the same questions. Like Marla, elephants approach a blank canvas with a blithe lack of inhibition and no preconceived idea of what a painting is supposed to look like. What matters to them is the process: the friction of the brush against the surface of the canvas, the creamy viscosity of the paint, and the fine-motor activity involved in making different kinds of marks, from long sweeping strokes to quick rhythmic dabs and slithery caresses.

Of course, neither Marla nor the elephants would be painting without some degree of instruction, encouragement, and access to quality art supplies. For this, Marla, who is now 7 and still painting, has her father. He sets her up with large primed canvases (measuring up to 5 square feet), tubes of acrylic paint, and an array of brushes, spatulas, and squirt bottles filled with watered-down pigment. The elephants have their trainers, called mahouts, who essentially collaborate with them, choosing the colors, proffering paint-loaded brushes, and, most importantly, whisking away the paper or canvas before it devolves into a drab, muddy mess. I suspect that Marla's dad plays a similar role in her creative process. The enthusiasm and unbridled spontaneity of a child or an elephant wielding a paintbrush can be beautiful to behold, but a successful abstract painting also requires a certain sober restraint, a capacity to step back, lay down the brush, and decide: This is it.

When people look at abstract paintings and say, "My kid could do that," they're right—up to a point. Given the right materials and a little bit of coaching, any kid—or elephant or chimpanzee—can produce something that looks like art, or at least something that looks like Abstract Expressionism. In the 1950s, artists like de Kooning and Pollock proposed a radically new way of thinking about painting: as the direct trace of the artist's physical engagement with the materials. Harold Rosenberg, the critic who first coined the term "action painting," put it like this: "At a certain moment the canvas began to appear to one American painter after another as an arena in which to act—rather than as a space in which to reproduce, re-design, analyze, or 'express' an object, actual or imagined. What was to go on the canvas was not a picture but an event." The Ab-Exers were great formal innovators, but even more important than Pollock's drips or de Kooning's arabesques was their revolutionary insight that a painting can represent nothing other than the process of its own creation.

Now, more than half a century later, we're still reeling from this revelation. Hence the continuing fascination with cases like Marla's. For those who believe that painting must be about something more than just color and gesture—like craft or technical skill or mimetic representation—abstract paintings by children and animals provide the ultimate refutation, proof that modern art is indeed a hoax. But such skeptics profoundly miss the point of the art they're trying to debunk. Yes, anyone can pick up a brush and slather paint on canvas in a drippy style that evokes Jackson Pollock. But it took an artist like Pollock to step back from his own work, which at the time looked unlike anything that had come before, and say, with bold conviction: "This is it. This is what modern painting looks like." In other words, Pollock taught us how to see art in a new way.

Marla, the elephants, and perhaps even your own brilliant progeny may be terrific painters—but they're not artists. This is because art is not just about making things or slapping pigment on canvas; it's also a way of thinking and seeing. Marla and the elephants are primitives, not prodigies. With no understanding of the issues at stake, there's little chance that their work will push art in any meaningful new direction. But this doesn't mean we should dismiss them entirely. As viewers, we can appreciate their paintings as art, even if they didn't intend them as such. And, as the stars of their own media circuses, these exuberant painters serve a crucial role as catalysts for discussion, inadvertently prodding a broader public to come to terms with the mid-century revolution in seeing that permanently and profoundly changed modern art.

Original here

Jason Statham Does a Little Bank Job

Jason Statham is not your average action star. He has that square jaw and serious look that would have made him a household name in the era of Steve McQueen, but with the 'everyday hero' taking off in the new millennium, Statham hasn't really broken through like he should in the States. (He's much bigger in the rest of the world.) Instead, Statham has carved out an incredibly consistent niche of macho action characters from The Transporter to Crank. Even in straight-to-video fare like the recently released Chaos, Jason Statham rarely fails to deliver. He's getting some of the best early reviews of his career for Roger Donaldson's The Bank Job, an action thriller based on a famous 1971 heist that opens this Friday. He sat down at a press conference recently to tell us about his character, his celebrity status in the U.K., and even working again with the director who gave him his big break, Guy Ritchie.

Jason Statham on how much he remembers about the real life robbery:

"We didn’t know much about it. I mean it’s a little...1971, I was barely on the planet at that period of time. So the fact that there was a D notice that was issued and I think there was like three days of press, each day was progressively more, leaning towards, you know the exposure of what was happening in and around the bank. On day four there was no further coverage in any of the newspapers, so for thirty odd years no one has really known anything about the robbery."

"Now when Roger decided to take on the movie, he’s a great man of research, so his learning of what happened in an around that time was as much to me and all of my friends. When I was telling them...I’d get newspaper cuttings, the police evidence pictures from inside the vault, from inside the handbag shop where they put all of the..., how big the tunnel was, where they threw all of the earth. So every night I’d go home with new information about the robbery and my mates are going, ‘yeah, yeah I’ll ask my dad about it’. And they said they remembered vaguely something in and around it, but no one really knew about it. It’s been sort of completely blanketed and I think a lot of people from back then will be glad to know what really happened, even if they could remember a robbery at all from the Lloyds Bank. I think it’s a great story that needed telling, but I can’t remember much. So preparing for the film was a bit of an education for me and all of my friends."

Statham on his character in the film:

"I think he’s doing this for his family, you know. I think he is a good person. Okay he’s got a side of him that...let’s say a darker side of him, well not really a dark side. Let’s just say that desperate men do desperate things and I think there is an innocence as much as there is a criminal side to Terry. I mean he’s just wanted to make a better life for himself and the family. I think if anyone is given an opportunity to do that, if you look at your circumstances, people try it all different ways. They go to Vegas and try to make a better life for themselves on a stupid slot machine. Are they respectable people? Some think yes and some think no. I mean the world is full of bad things that go on behind curtains and closed doors. And if you think that Terry is a bad person I could show you a lot of people who run around in suits and ties and put on this big front, top show about how respectable they are and they’ve got more seedy, dirty habits than you could possibly imagine."

"The fact that this guy is given an opportunity to rob a bank and you know they’re not stealing from the poor. They’re robbing a bank that contains...they’re basically robbing a safe deposit vault and the people that have these safety deposit boxes usually keep within them things they don’t want people to know about. A lot of things that are in these deposit boxes are illicit earnings anyway, there’s a lot of bad stuff, jewels that have been stolen, there’s money that doesn’t belong to people. So these boxes that they’re robbing, not to say we’re allowed to go steal that stuff, I’m not trying to dilute it and make it a justifiable act, but we’re not going in there with machine guns and balaclavas and hurting people. We’re doing something against the law, yes, but basically who is the law here? MI5 are trying to create a robbery themselves to protect their bad stuff and I think...the catch phrase is, ‘we’re the most innocent people involved’ and I think on this occasion we are."

On dealing with his celebrity status in the UK:

"I ain’t that popular, believe me. People are a bit more reserved back in the UK, you know, they’re not running around with pens and papers. Every now and then you get the odd fan here and there. So, yeah, I think it’s cool to make a film in the UK, some people give you props now and again. But it’s not like I’m Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise, I mean they’ve got problems."(laughs)

On the intelligence of Terry and his crew:

"That was a question I was sort of asking, cause I know a few crooks and crims from my earlier days, not that I’ve ever been involved with that kind of stuff...I used to sell perfume and jewelry in my own little way and it’s not like I sold stolen goods. But I do know different levels of crooks and criminals and I’ve met quite a few of them. Most of them don’t necessarily look like Dave and Steve the photographer, but you know what, there’s always a surprise. I’ve recently met someone who went to prison for a long time and you could never pigeon hole him as a guy who would do something against the law or would end up inside, so there’s always a surprise. They don’t have to look like Al Capone to be worthy of doing something against the law."

Statham on working with Guy Richie again:

"I’d love to work with Guy again, absolutely. Whenever he’s got the script he wants me involved with I will certainly be jumping up and down. I mean I can’t say no to him, I love him as a filmmaker, I love his style, I love his tastes, we’re good friends, we work well together, f**k yeah I’d jump at the chance."

And Vinnie Jones:

(laughs) "Vin’s and old friend of mine, we haven’t worked together for many years now. We live very close by and if we can do something and if Guy wants to direct it, great."

Jason Statham on future projects:

"Brazilian Job has just been out there in the stratosphere for quite some time and if that happens I’ll be very surprised. But I’m very happy to work with Mark and everybody and would love to do it, but it just doesn’t look realistic. Crank 2 is definitely happening, I’m going to throw myself around the streets of L.A. once more with the delightful Amy Smart and the mad Neveldine and Taylor. And I’m just about to go do Transporter 3 over in Paris with Luc Besson, so I’m preparing physically now with a very strict regime from six in the morning until mid-day every day."

-- Jordan Riefe

Original here

Friday, March 7, 2008

Hi-5: The 5 Hottest A-Cups in Hollywood

Breasts aren't everything. As hard as that may be to grasp, it's the truth: sometimes a great bone structure, figure, or face can make up for love pillows the size of basketballs. With that in mind, we present the five hottest A-cups (give or take a cup) in Hollywood.

Julia Stiles

Fuck you, Julia Stiles is cute. She's realistically attractive enough that a rather large amount of males find her incredibly underwhelming, but that's her charm; she looks like a dignified, legitimately pretty woman you might see in a college class. You may consider the phrase "realistically attractive" a synonym for "small breasted," but, again, this adds to the charm.

Kate Hudson

Kate Hudson, on the other hand, looks like she should have huge knockers. Not that Goldie Hawn did or anything, but considering the gal's face and the rest of her body, she just seems like the type to be packing D's. She played a band slut in Almost Famous, after all; one would naturally assume a cup size which, if translated into an academic grade, would result in failing a course. Unlike Stiles, Hudson's lack of boobage is an unfortunate flaw in an otherwise stellar body -- still, though, she's pretty hot regardless.

Rihanna

About half the pictures ever taken of Rihanna either look (A) hideous, or (B) like she's stuffed tennis balls into each half of her bra. In reality, Rihanna's lovely lady lumps don't amount to much, but they're nice enough that that doesn't quite matter. If you can't have girth, make 'em perky -- and Rihanna's love pillows are plenty perky.

Natalie Portman

Just in case you were thinking of complaining about Natalie Portman's small breasts, remember how many people were unreasonably excited to see The Darjeeling Limited simply because Natalie Portman was allegedly gonna be naked in the preceding short film, Hotel Chevalier. Big breasts or not, Natalie Portman is hot, and people want to see her naked. Again, while we may assume that breast size and attractiveness go hand in hand, Portman is actually a heck of a lot cuter without lugging around huge chest cannons; she looks a lot more charming, innocent, and attainable without them.

Keira Knightley

Ah, Keira Knightley. The woman with breasts so small that they had to Photoshop her chest for the King Arthur poster. The lady has had to deal with countless accusations of anorexia and/or bulimia since Bend it Like Beckham, so I won't beat a dead horse with small tits more than it already has been. Suffice it to say, however, that Keira Knightley should not have small breasts. She doesn't look attainable like Portman or Stiles; she looks like a classic sex goddess (look at that jawline), and it's more or less tragic that she doesn't have a body to match. Still, though. Hot.

Original here